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    孩子要上一年級,你準備好了嗎

    發布時間:2019-07-18 作者:本報記者 楊詠梅 來源:中國教育報

    7月5日晚,中國教育報家庭教育公開課“今天,我們怎樣做父母”請來重慶師范大學教授、中國教育報家庭教育周刊首席專家趙石屏和中國教育報深度版主編王強,一起討論如何理解“嚴禁小學化、堅持零起點”,家長應該如何幫助孩子盡快順利適應上學的要求,幼小銜接的關鍵是什么,如何做好最基本的入學準備。

    學之初的第一步是適應是讓孩子愛上學

    王強的女兒剛上完一年級,談到這一年對家長最大的挑戰,他說:“就怕孩子跟不上老師和同學的節奏。總覺得女兒基礎較差,語文識字量小、數學口算能力不強、英語單詞記不住,一看到她的這些問題暴露出來,心里就很擔憂,生怕她一步落后,步步落后。”

    其實,家長焦慮的主要原因是不了解一年級孩子學習的特點,不知道怎樣幫助孩子在起步階段打好基礎、開好頭。對此,趙石屏分析說,一年級孩子學習的特點有兩個“不可能”,一是不可能考慮問題周全,二是不可能長時間專心。還有三個“容易”,那就是容易忘記任務,容易被打擾,容易缺乏自信。“這些都是這個階段孩子的特點,而不是他們的缺點,在一年級到三年級都是正常的,家長切忌看成缺點去批評。”

    趙石屏認為,在幼升小、小升初、初升高的幾個節點中,幼小銜接要求的能力跨度是最大的,除了知識銜接,情緒和社會性也需要先適應再發展。小學教育規范程度很高,教學時間、課程設置、作息要求都很規范、嚴格,整個家庭都要配合孩子的作息時間調整生活節奏。“隨著老師的不斷要求、規訓,孩子的專注力和自控力會一天天發展起來,跟不上的現象就會自然消失。如果家長嚴厲地懲罰糾正,不僅效果差,還損害孩子上學的積極性,損失就大了。”

    “從幼兒園到小學,是過渡,更是轉折,是從以游戲和活動為主到以課程和教學為主的重大轉折。”趙石屏強調說,如何與人共處,如何認識自己,如何表達想法,如何解決矛盾沖突,如何體諒他人,如何分享、合作,都是孩子學之初的重要功課,一定要提前做準備,“但是很多家長陷入了知識準備的誤區,不懂得要在習慣、興趣和方法上提前準備。”

    觀察女兒上小學一年來的變化,王強感慨頗多:“一是更自律了,每天回家做作業都還算認真,會對照自己記的作業清單一項項完成作業;二是結交了一些新朋友,表現得更加自信一些了,基本適應學校生活了。”王強發現,女兒對自己喜歡的課,比如天文社團活動、口風琴音樂課,就會非常期待。

    對此,趙石屏說,一年級起步的重點不在分數而在適應,是讓孩子愛上學,這是小學一年級家長最大的任務。“喜歡是兒童在這個階段最主要的學習動力,孩子喜歡寫字才能寫好,喜歡上學才能學習好,喜歡學校才能更快地適應學校。”

    是否有必要給孩子報幼小銜接班?趙石屏說:“教育主管部門嚴禁幼兒園小學化,堅持小學一年級必須從零開始,因為提前教學會嚴重干擾兒童正常的智力發展。”因此,趙石屏建議家長在幼小銜接的準備上,眼光不能只盯著一年級,至少要看未來的12年,注重培養孩子的學校習慣、自主意識、自控力、理解力和適應能力、自理能力等,三年之內能夠基本適應都是正常的。

    養成緊跟老師、自己做、不拖拉的習慣

    小學一、二年級是習慣養成的關鍵期,學習習慣包括學習本身的行為習慣、用腦習慣,聽課、作業、復習、檢查的習慣,與學習有關的睡眠、飲食、運動習慣等。對一年級孩子而言,最重要的學習習慣有三個:緊跟老師、自己做、不拖拉。

    對這“吉祥三寶”,趙石屏具體分析說,緊跟老師不僅指眼睛跟著老師,大腦的思路在老師講課下指令的時候更是跟著老師的,這是保持高效率的學習習慣。

    “自己做,是孩子獨立面對自己的全部學習任務,一開始家長可以支持但一定不能替代,要讓孩子明白‘讀書是我的任務,我自己要認真獨立地完成’。”趙石屏建議家長要從穿脫衣服、起居洗漱等小事訓練孩子基本的自理能力,從最簡單的料理書包開始,逐漸學會料理自己的人際關系、職業發展、家庭建設等各種責任,“自己做,說小一點兒是料理自己的學習,說大一點兒是料理自己的人生。”

    針對王強說女兒在寫作業時有些拖拉的現象,趙石屏指出,一般來說,拖拉的孩子往往比較被動,始終是被安排的。還有一種拖拉的可能性是學習任務比較多,孩子覺得棘手,有畏難情緒,也會拖拉。“剛上學時家長可以幫助孩子,但一定不要催他,一定不要把掌控權完全放在自己手里,要相信孩子,凡是孩子自己能安排的就交給他安排,哪怕他剛開始安排得不夠好,也要少批評多鼓勵,只要好一點兒就不要吝嗇表揚,盡可能在一到三年級之內基本糾正孩子拖拉的毛病。”

    培養孩子好習慣有什么訣竅?“重復、再重復,每天如此,溫和地堅持,直到成為自然而然的習慣性行為。”在這方面,趙石屏建議家長要向老師學習,“一、二年級的老師會通過不斷重復幫助孩子養成好習慣,家長也要和學校保持一致,一到三年級要把習慣養成放在很重要的位置。”

    至于家長如何做到“溫和地堅持”,而不是“大吼大叫”,趙石屏說:“家長不需要講多少道理,更不需要喋喋不休。家長的堅持,其實是培養孩子的自控力,讓孩子明白上學并不只是好玩、只做自己喜歡的事情。不喜歡做的事情、有困難的事情也要做好,要努力做好。”

    “半學習”狀態需要“慢教育”心態

    王強回顧孩子上小學一年來的變化,深有體會地說:“其實,這一年走下來,我覺得有些知識性的東西,時候到了,孩子自然而然就懂了,用不著當時非要逼孩子完全弄懂。比如這學期學習認元、角、分,我女兒最開始學時總是弄混,我費了很大勁兒教她,看她還是出錯就很生氣,結果現在她已經完全明白了。所以,過度逼孩子不值當,家長要相信學校、相信老師、相信孩子。”

    對此,趙石屏指出一年級孩子處于“半學習”狀態,孩子一半時間玩、一半時間學,處于半游戲半學習的轉變中,家長要用慢教育的心態去細微地引導孩子:“眼光要放到孩子3年或6年以后的發展,心態一定要淡定,就像馬拉松長跑的裁判判輸贏是看終點不是看起點。12年是一個長跑,這個長跑中間的能力生長是最重要的,所以家長要有慢教育的理念。”

    關于輔導孩子學習這個話題,趙石屏主張,家長既然要輔導,就要照著學科教學,往專業性去靠,但相比教師的專業指導,家長的優勢是給孩子更多的鼓勵和贊揚,“在孩子作業對錯的問題上,尤其是一年級的孩子,嚴格講,他們不會做或者做錯了反而是正常的,沒有學會、稍微遲鈍一點兒,真的不用批評”。

    趙石屏特別強調家長要研究問題究竟在哪里,不要認為指責孩子是理所當然的,要學習提高孩子學習能力的方法,“方法得當,就會喚起兒童的想象力,一罵,把孩子的靈性罵回去,損失就大了。因為兒童解讀成人的批評或表揚,首先讀的是情緒,盡管家長口頭上說沒關系,他們也能讀出你是不是真的在生氣”。

    孩子放學后要不要上補習班?趙石屏明確指出這種學習方法叫低效的重復,是不可持續的,素質教育當從操場開始,“校外補習應該首選體育項目,比如足球、游泳、羽毛球、舞蹈、跆拳道等能夠充分活動的運動項目。孩子一定要有奔跑、跳躍、游戲、猛烈的呼吸,才能獲得充沛的學習精力”。

    趙石屏引用《中國兒童青少年身體活動指南》對“充分的身體活動”的基本要求,提醒家長要知道“6—17歲兒童青少年,每日累計60分鐘的中高強度身體活動,包括每周至少3天的高強度身體活動,以及增強肌肉力量、骨骼健康的抗阻活動”。可惜現在多數一年級孩子都未能享受這種“大汗淋漓、猛烈呼吸”的運動之樂,而“睡眠不足和運動不足,是孩子學業困難的重要原因”。

    《中國教育報》2019年07月18日第7版 

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